Its ALMOST holidays...

The year is racing towards the finish line with such speed I really don't know which way is up most days. I am counting sleeps with the kids because I really need some downtime to regroup and get all my ducks in a row again. I'm constantly looking for my notebook to add more things to the holiday list or the Christmas pressie shopping list. I'm going totally OCD with my lists and driving the rest of the family crazy. 

We fetched report cards this morning and said thank you and goodbye to the teachers. We did some fun bracelets for teacher gifts this year. I think they are pretty awesome. Sometime different to the usual chocolates and hand creams. 

I usually reflect back on the year a little bit later in December but I was chatting to Mr W's teacher this morning and she reminded me how far he has come this year. He started the year off as a shy, reserved boy and grew into a little chap with self confidence. He really came into his own this year. He made a really good friend and I can see that this is going to be a long friendship. I have never seen 2 little boys just totally "get" each other like these two. They have even developed their own special way to communicate! With a few nods and shakes of the head, they are totally on the same page whilst the rest of us are still wondering what on earth is being discussed! Once in a while the kids have a teacher who just means the world to them (and to their mom) - Mr W had one of those this year. These teachers are so much more than just mere teachers - they make a profound change to your child's life and I will forever be grateful for this teacher for doing that for Mr W. 

Ms M rocked this year like she always does. She thrived in so many areas and got an amazing opportunity to represent SA at the Commonwealth Chess games in India. How many 8 year olds go to India to play chess? She worked hard this year and it makes me so proud. She started out the year with clear goals and she did everything she set out to do and more. We hit a bit of a rocky patch in the middle of the year with girls bullying her and making her life miserable but even that she faced head on and I can see she is not even giving it a second thought anymore. Her rapport card reads like a bit slot machine according to Mr K... 7 - 7 - 7! She has a great teacher next year and a very good friend who will be in the same class. I am so glad for her because she deserves a bit of happy to end this year with! 

Onto other news.. I found this on my desk this morning with the new Joel Osteen book. I am overjoyed about the book as I was planning on buying it for myself anyway but even more I didn't know that all the nonsense I talk on a daily basis made such an impact on this lady's life. She is a single mum with a son the same age as Mr W so Mrs Bossy Boots is always offering advice and an opinion on various mommy things. Her fiance was killed in a car accident last year, right before she started working here and her mom the beginning of this year. I burst into tears when I read her card... how SWEET! Just shows that a little friendliness (or is that bossiness??) can make a huge difference to someone's life. How cute is the drawing? She calls me the Queen. I think its SO funny cause I can be a bit of a drama queen at work! :) I am so humbled by her kindness and generosity. This surprise gift has definitely made my week! 

End year functions, Christmas parties and more

This weekend was one of those crazy ones where you think it was weekend but you are not really sure cause you were just so busy that you didn't spend much time at home.

Friday night we finished up at holiday camp swim school. We have had such special instructors this year and both kids have really made so much progress in the last 3 months. I am very grateful that we decided to stick it out even when its a real pain to take them cause its quite far from school and because it means that we get home late on Tuesdays with very grumpy tired kids. The reward for completing the camp was a chocolate medal and a beautiful embroidered t-shirt. The kids LOVE t-shirts with logos and slogans on so this was such a treat for them.

I promised the kids that we can attempt gingerbread houses this year and although the houses are not made from ginger bread biscuits (I cheated and used Golden Cloud's cookie mix) it was such a fun project. What I really loved that it kept all of us busy for quite a long time. Mr W demanded a break from all this baking after about 1.5 hours of decorating :)

Saturday afternoon was our work year end function. As always there was lots of laughs, lots of pressies and fun to be had. As usual the "unwanted" gift was the hit of the party. The rules state that you have to bring an unwanted but unused and unopened present to the party to swop with someone else's unwanted gift. The gifts are wrapped so you never know what you are getting. There was a a set of wooden cats, the ugliest candle I have ever seen and a really old unopened board game from 2005 that made their rounds. The gifts are REALLY awful but its so funny ending up with someone else's unwanted gifts. Printing is an incredibly stressful industry to work in with tight deadlines and incredibly demanding clients. I love it that at the end of the year we can all sit around a table and just be friends in spite of it all. 

We finished off the weekend with our monthly dinner club's Christmas party. I can't remember when last I spent the entire day in the pool with the kids. I love our dinner club buddies. We are all so different but every month the conversation just picks up where we left off last month and we spend the entire day/evening chatting away.

What an incredibly nice South African Summer day. The entire family was in bed before 8 last night ...tired and happy. 

rapport cards and end of the year drama

M started going to Mr's W school in January of 2011 and now after 5 years we are done with "baby" school. Next year Mr W is in grade R and Miss M in grade 3. I'm so sad yet also happy about this new phase. My babies are growing up so quickly! 

The teachers put so much effort into the school's last rapports for the year. I have never cried about a rapport card before but this one with all its special memories of 2015 made me bawl. 

Mr W - I am SO proud of you and I am so excited for the journey ahead of us. 

Mr W is 5!

Dear Mr W,

You are 5! I almost can't believe I am typing this. I can still remember when you made your dramatic entrance into the world in the ward at 3:26 instead of the labour room no less. I can remember your lifeless blue body when the doctor had to grab you from me and start CPR to keep you breathing. I remember the time we spent in the NICU. Me telling you how much I love you, how long I have waited for you and how much I wanted to take you home to meet your sister. I have clear memories of us having long chats in the small hours of the morning while the rest of the world was sleeping. The excitement of finally taking you home... And now you turned five.

You are such a special little dude. Me and you still have long chats but luckily they are not in the middle of the night anymore. You are my little kitchen helper and the one who is always first to ask "How was your day, mommy?" You are a super star in making sure all our furry friends get their treats before we leave in the morning. You detest colouring in and art is hard work and you do not enjoy it at all. Your teacher says what she admires about you is that you will finish every project even though one can honestly see that you would much rather be doing anything else.

You love your Minion duvet and gets very upset when its wash day. You love swords, guns and anything army. Favourite cereal is still weetbix with water (yuck) and you wont eat if if you didnt see me put the sugar in. Favourite lunchbox treat is a chocolate muffin from Wild Bean Cafe and your least favourite popcorn. You are not a morning just like me. We avoid the other 2 members of the family and their cheery conversation first thing in the morning. Actually we run in the opposite direction if we hear them coming!

My boy... My little man... I pray that you will soar and that you will be a true man of God. I pray that your life will be filled with the fruit of the spirit and that you will never forget the important things in life. All those things that seem important when you are young... They are not. Forget the fast car, the perfect girl, the great body... Find the things and people who give you joy and keep them close. I love you with all my heart x

Bucket list for December 2015

I saw this on SUPERbusyMOM 2.0's blog (https://superbusymom2point0.wordpress.com) this morning and I immediately couldn't wait to write my own! Life is so busy and a while ago I thought to myself I should plan more outings, do more things... the kids grow up so fast and then all we are going to have left from this precious time growing up are the memories! (And lots of photos of course!!)

First on our list is definitely a visit to Dinokeng.  I designed a vistor's guide for them a while ago and since then I have been dying to go. Who knew there was such a nice game reserve right on our doorstep!

I think a follow up visit to the super fun water slides at Zambibush is defintely on our list.

I might not be able to walk the next day because that red slide is not as meek and mild as it seems but I cant wait to let my inner 5 year old come out.

We are super blessed to kick off our holiday with a week at the beach! Wooohoo! 

Lots of sand, water, sun are vital ingredients to recharge our batteries.

I love ice skating but we haven't been there in the last 6 month even though its literally 5k's from home. Miss M is a little pro but Mr W still hangs onto mum's hand all the way around. Nice outing for daddy to show off his cool moves and its usually nice and cool to be inside the rink when its a 40 degree summer day outside!

The kids have been Acro Branching quite a few times this year but I haven't tried it yet.

I am deadly afraid of heights and I am probably going to wet myself but I think this is my birthday outing for the year. If I'm brave enough...  Every year I pick something fun/extreme/nuts to do on my birthday which I usually end up regretting yet loving at the same time!

I can't wait for the holidays. A whole month of relaxing with my family. There is a lot of other things on the kids lists like another visit to BOUNCE Inc and the Snake Park in Harties which we will probably also fit in somewhere.  I know we will be spending a lot of time in and around the pool,  having braai's with friends and generally just hanging out and having fun. We play lots of board games, legos, Miss M and I read a lot while the boys watch their "stories" on TV. Its such a special time of the year for me and there are only 19 sleeps left! WOOOOHAAAAA! x

Be thankful

I wrote this about a year ago and its so relevant to how I feel lately so I'm going to post it on my "new" blog! 

I am a worrier. I over think and over analyze things. I have been feeling hurt and unsure because of various things that has happened the last few weeks. Tonight I had dinner with a dear friend who put all my irritations right back into perspective for me. I feel awful for judging someone instead of loving. I let my own human nature get in the way of what God wanted from me. She is such an inspiration to me and I walked away with so much food for thought. I need to learn to let go... of people... of past hurts... of doing too much... of seasons that are over in my life... When we hold onto past hurts and by not forgiving we are actually only hurting ourselves. Holding on to anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. I am so guilty of this, time and time again. I need to learn to let go of things. I realise that this is something I need to work on.

That being said... the other thing that has been on my mind is competitiveness. Miss M is like me, we push ourselves harder than what is needed but because we work hard, I don't know why we cannot be proud of what we have achieved. I don't mean bragging about being better than someone else but being happy about succeeding. Miss M, like me, competes with herself and she is happy for anyone who does well in something. God blessed us all with different talents and its our job to use it to God's glory. I think we honour God by working joyfully. Kahlil Gibran writes, "Work is love made visible and another one. Keeping yourself with labour you are in truth loving life."

"Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people do that but the really great make you feel that you too, can become great. Hang out with friends who are likeminded and who are also designing purpose filled lives." Mark Twain

I think its fair to say that we all have different priorities. Things that are important to me might not be important at all to the next person but thats okay. Its okay to be different and to care about different things. I wish people would stop the hurtful comments and embrace being different. At the moment I feel like I need a break from all of it.  I want to crawl under a rock and hide. I have realised that I need to go back to the drawing board... put God first.. and then all the rest of it. Sometimes being busy even with good deeds are not a good thing. Its not necessarily God's plan or will for your life right at that moment. I think I have blogged about it before but finding your balance in life is hard work cause the "target" keeps on moving. It is something that I need to work on daily. I am drained by all the bad things that have happened to people around me lately... its time to focus on the good... to have HOPE... to focus on things and people that give me JOY.

I remember reading this once ...

Its easier to be sad than to live a happy life.  Its easier to complain than to be happy. Its SO true. Some people love to complain. They LOVE drama and feeling sorry for themselves. I have to remind myself often to not get dragged into that negative way of thinking. Being healthy, having a good marriage, raising kids that are well behaved is hard work but its WORTH it. I try my best to focus on being thankful and to not get drawn into the drama but let me tell you, some days its DAMN hard!

This is my desktop background at the moment. A constant reminder to be thankful!

We love weekends!

Mr W took part in his first judo tournament this weekend and boy, it was SO  much fun! I am so impressed with his Sensei and with the amount that Mr W has learnt in the last 6 months. I could see that he was having a blast and for once it took no convincing from me to go join his friends and take part. I am overjoyed that we have finally found something that Mr W loves to do. This is one proud mama bear!

How cute is this boy? I just want to eat him right up

After a lot of backwards and forwards Mr W decided that he wants to celebrate his birthday at the new resort in town, called Zambibush. The agreement was cousins and one best friend because its a swimming resort and I am terrified of kids getting hurt on my watch. Last year I learnt the hard way that people love to drop their 4 year olds in your lap and fetch them later. I was a bit skeptical cause Mr W has only recently got the hang of swimming and I was worried that Zambibush catered more for the older kids. I was pleasantly surprised but they have more than enough to do for young and old. All the adults and all the kids swam almost the whole day. Just stopping long enough for a quick hot dog on the braai and something to drink. You can take in everything you need for the day so pack a well stocked picnic basket. Its very well priced at R70 per adult and R50 per child. Zambibush is definitely on our December holiday to do list.  

Mr K embracing his inner 5 year old :)

An easy peasy army cake for an army mad 5 year old!

A bit more about me

Are you named after someone?
Nope. I was a surprise baby and there wasn't another family name left to give me. My sister and brother have very serious traditional Afrikaans family names.

When was the last time you cried? 
Sunday in Church. The raw emotions around me always gets to me and I seem to bawl ever time I hear the song THRIVE

The chorus is something like this - "We know we were made for so much more than ordinary lives. Its time for us to more than just survive. We were made to thrive." 

Do you have kids? 
I do! A grade 2 girly and an almost 5 year old rough and tumble boy.

If you were another person, would you be a friend of yourself?
I think so. Everyone needs a redhead friend to make their life complete :)

Do you have a guilty pleasure?
I love reading. I love stories and losing myself in a book.

Do you like handwriting? 
I do! I write a lot like my sister but her handwriting is neater than mine. 

What is your favorite cereal? 
I have never really eaten cereal for breakfast but if I have to choose it would be strawberry pops.

What is the first thing you notice about people? 
Nothing specific actually. I am so oblivious... Sometimes my husband cuts his hair and I only notice 3 days later. Big oops.

What color are your eyes? 
Blue

Scary movies or happy endings?
Happy endings. I am a huge Nicolas Sparks fan.

Favorite TV show?
At the moment its the good wife. I love series - chicago fire, greys, masterchef, etc, etc.

Summer or winter? 
Summer

Hugs or kisses? 
Hugs... Physical touch is last on my love language scale.
Im not crazy about people touching me. Of course the girls at work loves to hug me and play with my hair just to annoy me. I must be honest it doesnt freak me out anymore, I just laugh and hope they leave soon.

What’s the furthest you’ve been from home? 
India early this year when miss M played chess in the commonwealth games. I have no great need to travel. I love exploring South Africa though.

Do you have special talents? 
I can draw quite well and I like taking photos.

X

Last week was one CRAZZZZZZZZY week! Ms M decided that she really wants to be on the swim team and started to practice with the school's new coach. Three mornings of leaving the house at 6 am with packed lunch boxes and fed kids. I feel like I should give myself a high five for getting everyone where they needed to be on time.

As most of you know, it has been one of the hotest weeks ever in P-town. Everyone seemed to be a bit on edge and irritated because of the heat. The kids kept on waking up in the middle of the night because they are hot/thirsty/irritated... Im a gal who loves my sleep so between getting up early and being woken up it was not a fun week. Then Thursday happens.. The highlight of my crazy... I pulled an all nighter at work. Really... I worked all night and saw the sun come up on Friday. I never do this anymore because lets face I am not quite the spring chicken I pretend to be anymore. I felt like the walking dead all weekend which really annoys me cause its the only real uninterrupted family time we have in a week. I have always been the big mouth mom who had a  lot to say about loving work and not wanting to be a SAHM but lately I wonder... I might have mumbled something to mr K about it which almost made him fall of his chair. He was not impressed at all to say the least. Financially we are almost were we want to be - finally being able to save for our kids future education and dreaming about a bigger house with a pool. I am reading a book that keeps on reminding me to bloom where you are planted. You are in a certain place for a certain amount of time for a reason... But yet I find myself asking - is it all worth it? Am I a better mom to my kids cause I am doing something I love even though it stresses me out on occassion? Then the dreaded question... Am I spending enough quality time with them, building our relationship? Ugghhh who knows!? Only time will tell I guess.

Onto a more fun topic. Mr W is having his birthday 9 days. We started the count down at day 28 this year. My boy is getting so big and what I really love is that he is such a momma's boy at the moment. We are not having a party this year for lots of reasons but I will be taking him, his sister and a few friends to zambibush resort - a new waterpark that opened a while ago. I find myself stressing over party packs and cake for 5 kids. I know its nuts but I cant seem to help myself. I want him to have a good time and not feel deprived because I didnt want to spend 3k on a party this year. Guilt... Glorious mommy guilt...

Like they say, tomorrow is a new day! Roll on Monday! X

Why I hate religion but love Jesus...

This video Why I hate religion really resonated with me today. I can't really decide where I want to go with this blog but one thing that I know I want to write about is my journey with Jesus. My walk is far from perfect but so often I read something, hear something or God shows me something so profound that I have to share it. I feel like I cannot keep it to myself because what if my mistakes, my journey can make a difference to someone else?

I still have a lot of growing to do and I stumble daily. I fail miserably and fall short a lot. I ask for forgiveness, pick myself up and try again. I am okay with not being perfect. I shout at the kids (and hate myself for it afterwards) I complain about my husband not helping me around the house like I think he should, I get irritated at work... I am human and as long as I keep on trying to do better tomorrow its okay to make mistakes. The Bible says God's grace is made new every morning. New. Every. Single. Morning.

I strive to set an example for my kids and I apologise to them when I make mistakes and sin. We have discussions about everything. I'm honest when I don't know the answer to some of their questions. My biggest desire is to raise kids who knows Jesus. Children who has a relationship with Jesus and won't hesitate to admit it.

Some of the things in the video REALLY stood out to me for example, the difference between Jesus and religion. One is the work of God and one is a man made invention... There is a problem if people only know you are a Christian by your Face.Book...

Matthew 7:21-23 (NLT)

21 “Not everyone who calls out to me, ‘Lord! Lord!’ will enter the Kingdom of Heaven. Only those who actually do the will of my Father in heaven will enter. 22 On judgment day many will say to me, ‘Lord! Lord! We prophesied in your name and cast out demons in your name and performed many miracles in your name.’ 23 But I will reply, ‘I never knew you. Get away from me, you who break God’s laws.’

Be kind

This weekend was one of those where I had to keep on checking my watch to make sure we left activities/parties on time so that we could get to the next one on time. HECTIC doesn't even begin to describe it!

The day started off with Mr W meeting his Gr R teacher for next year. Such a sweet kind lady! I know he is going to be so happy with her next year... of course it helps a lot of your best buddy is in the same class as you. These two boys are so sweet and sensitive and plays so nicely together. I saw a bit of a tussle with them and another boy and I was amazed at how these two just had each other backs. It makes my soul so happy to know that my boy has someone in his corner no matter what happens. It warmed my heart when Mr S's mom told me that S prays for W every night... We do the same. This is such a precious friendship and I hope that it will last for years to come. It reminds me of the verse - "... a real friend sticks closer than a brother" Proverbs 18:24

At the last party of the day something happened that really ruined an almost perfect day for me. The moms were sitting around under a tree pulling apart and talking about all the teachers as well as kids that they deemed to be naughty and/or bullies. A good old fashioned "skinner." It was SO nasty... there is no other word for it. O my goodness... I was so shocked to say the very least. My view on teachers is that we all have different personalities and some teachers, I am going to get along better with than others. At then end of the day I will treat all teachers with respect and expect the same from my children.

I am probably not going to be very popular for what I am about to say but it was extremely hard for me to sit around and listen to this nonsense. I had to really grit my teeth to not say something and in hind sight - should I not have said something? I cannot believe that people can be so nasty and judgmental. We are so quick to judge but we don't really know the person whom we are judging circumstances. So often I think that one bad word could be the last straw for the person being discussed. What upset me even more is that a lot of the kids were sitting around us listening to the conversation. Sometimes as Christians we are so worried about being called judgmental that we become tolerant of sin. I have to remind myself that I am commanded to love the person and hate the sin - not to judge.  Teaching is a serving profession.. and not a very highly paid one at that. I would never be able to be a teacher - I don't even have enough patience with my own kids on a good day! These ladies have a calling to teach children. I think its just SO wrong to judge them for everything they did or didn't do wrong. People need to remember these ladies are also just normal humans with their own families, their own problems to go home to at the end of the day. I have been avoiding certain mom's and mom groups all year but obviously at a party there is not much one can do about it. I think my heart is just so sore that instead of having a nice friendly chat - sharing with fellow moms - it was nasty and negative from the word go.

On the upsides.. thank the pope for all the NICE moms out there. *high five* to all of you for building up instead of breaking down!

On that note... have a GREAT week!
xoxo

Reading

If there is one thing that I repeatedly tell my kids is that "readers are leaders!" When it comes to school stuff, the one thing that I'm very strict about its reading. I want my kids to be above average readers. I love reading and I truly believe that if you can read, you can move mountains. If you read a few articles online, you will find a vast amount of info about why reading is so important. I prefer reading to TV and read almost every night. The nights I don't read, I'm either sick or working :)

I have quite a library at home for M to read - mostly books that I use to read as a kid and some that I have bought in anticipation of my kids reading (and hopefully) enjoying them as much as I did.

Lately we have been going to the library to get Miss M books (and she takes out 2 books a week at school) but I am finding it quite a mission. (I don't know why... I have strange issues!) Lately I have been buying books online at take.alot.com but I find it expensive. To spend R80-R130 on a book that Miss M reads within a day (sometimes 2 if we are lucky!) is just too much. Soooo.... I decided to stop being lazy and go to my favourite second hand bookstore - Mega Books - and found these for R12-15 each! What a bargain! I haven't been there in a while because I read on my kindle but after today's bargain shopping I will definitely go back soon. I bought 8 books for less than R70 bucks. The even better news is, that they are still in such good condition. I am going to be the best mom in the world tonight when M sees that I found her a "Goosebumps" book in Afrikaans. Yay ME!

Blogging

Ive been blogging since before Mr W was born, thats almost 5 years ago. Time flies..  o my goodness! Anyway... I recently decided to create a new "open" (for lack of a better word) blog because I like writing about mommy things and interacting with other blogging moms but on the other hand, I have to protect my kids identity. This blog is for me, so in all fairness, even though I write about my kids, I will have to be more careful about photos I post and what I write about.

I thought long and hard about a name for my blog and I decided if there is one thing that I want to be, one thing I want to teach my children, it is to always be hopeful. We ALWAYS have hope. We can choose hope in every situation, no matter how bad things seem in the natural world. We have supernatural hope and no one can ever take that away from you. One of my favourite bible verses is ... FAITH is being sure of what you HOPE for and being certain of thing unseen. No matter what happens or what storm hits, I will always remain a hopeful mom.

Ramblings

I start a new blog and then I neglect it!!! I truly SUCK but anyway! Let me update you on what is happening over at our house. We did Santa Shoeboxes this year and I can honestly say that we all loved it. We do various projects throughout the year to teach the kids about people who are not as fortunate as we are but it was our first shoebox project. It was such a humbling experience when Wian asked me with quite a HORRIFIED face, why we are buying soap and a toothbrush for a Christmas pressie? I think he honestly thought I was losing the plot a bit! Where is the FUN stuff, Mum? I showed them a few videos on F.B. about how excited these kids get when opening the boxes and that soap and toothbrushes are something worth getting excited about for them. How sad is that?
It was good for all of us to pause in the midst of our busy lives and just be grateful for what we have.

Work is so tense at the moment. (I might need to write about that topic soon but not today.. perhaps getting it all off my chest might make me feel better about it!) Apart from all the drama, when you ask the work peeps to give to a cause, they all come to the party and then some. I'm so proud to say that we collected 17 shoeboxes. It would have been even more if I told them all about it earlier. I'm proud to work with such giving people. Always willing to help and reach out to those in need. Apart from Santa Shoebox, we did Santa Paws boxes as well as some other shoeboxes for our church.  Well done girls! :) I am a firm believer in as freely as you give, you will receive... Next year we will pledge even more boxes!

M&W started swimming lesson again a few months ago and swimming lessons for W is ALWAYS a struggle. He is definitely not a water baby like his mom  and sister. I am proud to say that he swam a whole length in the pool this week. **high five my baby** Mommy is so proud of you for hanging in there until you got the hang of it! M is a real water baby and the coach approached me again this week to discuss introducing her to club swimming. I still feel that we are not quite ready yet. Perhaps next year... I am very careful to not fill up her schedule too much. We are already busy with "negotiations" for the 2016 extra curricular activities if you can believe it!! W is a easy baby... he just goes with the flow but M has to plan, think, dream about all the activities. If I give her, her own way she will probably never have time for actual schoolwork. I think at the moment we are leaning towards Voortrekkers and swimming for both... Rugby, Cricket and Judo for W and for M, Chess, Drama, Netball and the latest one she is pondering about is dance. Ballet or Hip Hop? I am still keen for us to join a running club but so far only 3 out of the 4 of us are keen about this idea. I shall bat my lashes a bit more at Mr K an see if we can get a "yes" out of him before the end of the year. I think it will be a nice family activity and he seems to think that we won't really have time for it once the year gets started... anyway... we will see how things work out.

Before I carry on doing what I actual get paid to do... we grew TOMATOES! How cool is that? I am like a hospice worker when it comes to plants. I cannot get anything to grow and here, without too much effort on my part, I grew a whole BUSH of tomatoes! Can you tell how seriously chuffed I am?

On Moving and other random thoughts

A new notebook or diary fills me with so much excitement...  a new blog with a new name does the same thing. New beginnings... A clean page to fill up with my thoughts and ramblings. I'm going to steal a page out of Cat's book (or blog) and blog about what is going on in our lives but try and protect my kids identities and not show photos of their faces.. only photos of hands, feet, etc. or mention their names. It was something that I never really considered before but with after a chat with a friend it does make more sense to protect the kid a bit. I love my other blog but that is more of a diary for the kids .. this one is for me. My thoughts, my fears, hopes and dreams.. my daily struggle as a working mom to really be there for my kids... to truly HEAR them...

So who am I? I am a designer who love my job, a mom who is head over heals in love with my kids and a wife to my first love... Its not all hearts and roses though, there has been moments where I want to leave the kids outside in the box with a sign that says "free to a good home" :)

Let me introduce you to the rest of the family....

Miss M is a 8 year old with the most gorgeous big brown eyes and huge determination to conquer everything she sets her mind on. She loves Jesus and teaches me about forgiveness and letting go on a daily basis.

Mr W is a 4 year old that runs through life with a laugh and a smile. This boy owns my heart. He loves hanging out in the kitchen with Mommy and baking up a storm

Mr K is the person whom my soul loves. He drives me nuts but he is the one special person who I want to annoy for the rest of my life.

So here goes... This is me...